Just wanted to wish you a Happy New Years and to thank you for visiting my site in '05. I think it's been pretty successful. My only goal has been to write about my (sex) life and have lots of people visit the site. So I think I did a pretty good job.

I just hope that in '06 I have a lot more to write about. So, I'll do my best to have a great sex life.

And that's it for the last post of the year. I have to go get ready for work - then after that it's party time.

I hope everyone is having a good Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Festivus. So far my Christmas has been pretty good. I got some pretty cool presents including a naughty present from my roommate. She bought me a brand new vibrator which I think will be getting a lot of use. And it's kind of funny because we both have the same vibrator now.

But most importantly I had some time to relax. I've taken two naps so far today - and I'm going to need all the energy I can get for Monday. I'm sure it's going to be crazy. Let's just hope I can make it through the day.

So, hopefully my next update will be Monday night if I survive the day.

Again, sorry I haven't update for a while. I work in retail and it started off as a pretty slow holiday season but this past week has been insane. I've been getting home late and too tired to write so please forgive me.

I'm going to try something new - I have a date Monday night. Instead of sleeping with the guy first then going on the date when I start to feel like I'm being used.

Only problem is that he's a really nice guy. He was even nervous about asking me out. In the past, I haven't been able to stay with nice guys for long. Which, I don't even know why I'm thinking about a relationship with him. Outside of seeing him a few times in the mall (he works at another store) I don't know much about him.

Other than that, I don't think I'd have much to write about even if I had the time Since, my one nighter my love life has been DOA.

I'm not going out tonight, just going to make a nice hot bath and relax my tired body. And after that I'll have a little personal time with my vibrator.

So, I'm a little drunk but I've been good. At least this is better than drunk calling Troy. And believe me I really wanted to. I'm so horny right now.

I went out again to some bars tonight - a lot of cute guys and I even made out with one but I don't know. I wasn't in the mood for a one night stand again.

I really don't know what I want. Well, I really want to see Troy again but I know things wouldn't be right if we did it again.

Anyways, I hope this all makes sense. Time for me to pass out in my own bed for once.

I wouldn't say I'm over Troy - in fact I know I'm not but things did get easier. Wednesday, after work and since I suddenly have a lot more free time, I went out with my friends to a bar.

It didn't take me too long to get a nice buzz going and before I knew it I was a little drunk. And when I get drunk I get horny. There were a few cute guys there but none were approaching me. So, I was about to do another thing I do when I get drunk. I was going to make a drunk phonecall to Troy. But luckily, as I'm walking around looking for a quiet place to call him when I found the hallway to the bathroom. As I'm about to hit call, a guy walks out of the bathroom and smiles at me. So I flipped my phone closed and asked him what he was smiling about.

I'm really not sure what was said after that. Literally the next thing, I know we're kissing. At first that's all I wanted to do. We kissed for a while, had a few more drinks and talked for a little while. And by now, we're standing by the bar, his arms wrapped around me. And at some point, he pressed his hard cock against me. It turned me on.

And, I'm pretty sure, I wouldn't have gone home with him if I hadn't just had a break up earlier in the week but when he asked me I didn't hesitate.

I don't even know what his apartment looks like but we make it thru the darkness into his bedroom. I told him I just wanted to kiss and sleep together but I think we both knew I was lying.

Within a few minutes, we're both naked. He's putting on a condom and I'm lying on my back with my legs spread.

It wasn't good sex. It was sloppy sex. Troy's definitely a better lover but it was what I needed. He came and I was glad it didn't take too long. I was ready to passout.

It's been a while since I've done a one night stand. Maybe, it'll be the last one for a while but I have a feeling it's not going to be.

So I think things may be over with Troy. Or near over. For the first time in a long time I'm sleeping in my own bed. Things have changed and I'm not exactly sure what.

For the past few weeks we've only been sleeping together once or twice a every couple of days. Way down from our once or twice a day. Then last week, the sex just didn't feel good anymore. Well, it felt amazingly good but not good emotionally.

I think we both just thought it was a phase so we tried to spice things up.

Friday night we went out on a date - got all dressed up and everything. And headed to down town Chicago to go to one of the nicer restaurants. But things didn't go to smoothly. First off we got stuck in traffic, which we kind of knew we would but we hoped by seven pm there would be less. And even though we were surrounded by cars, I my hands found their way into his pants. He tried to stop me, although he didn't try to hard.

My mouth found his way to his cock. It was kind of dark so I don't think too many people saw.

And we we're having a lot of fun. We were both laughing and acting silly.

But as soon as he came, the mood changed. I don't know why. Suddenly, we didn't have much to talk about. And the rest of the trip was like that, and most of dinner was like that until we started getting a little drunk. Well, I got a lot bit drunk. There wasn't much else to do since we weren't talking.

And once dinner was over, we went to a hotel instead of going home. We fucked as soon as we walked through the door. It was sloppy but a good start.

Then, I made him call Mark. And while, we waited for Mark to get there, I wouldn't let him touch me.

But as soon as Mark was there, I was on my knees for him, literally pushing him against the door after we closed it. I only stopped when I told Troy to go get me a bottle of vodka. And after Troy was gone, I didn't stop giving head to Mark until he came all over my face.

After, I washed off we got into bed and with a little persuasion he was ready to go again. He was fucking me hard when Troy came back. And I watched Troy watch us as we Mark thrusted into me. I put on a show, moaning really loud.

They took turns fucking me. And it felt really good.

They both came and so did I before we finally decided to call it night and Mark went home.

I woke up feeling the next morning feeling dirty and not in good slutty way. I woke up in a wet spot on the bed and I knew it wasn't going to be my morning.

Of course Troy wanted to fuck again. I went through he motions. Even though he was the same as always it really didn't feel good. I think it was an emotional thing. I don't think I have an emotional feeling for him anymore.

I wanted him to cum quickly but of course he wouldn't. He didn't stop until I faked an orgasm and he came.

We haven't had sex since then. Last night, I slept in his bed but rolled away from him when he tried to touch me.

And I don't think I'll be in that bed anytime soon. I still want to fuck him but I don't feel for him anymore. I don't really know how to explain it.

And I really want to fuck Mark again but I'm guessing it would be good to stay away from him.

So I had an interesting dream last night. So intersting it's been stuck in my head all night.

I was in a high rise apartment in a city - with a lot of other apartments around. I was fooling around with an exboyfriend. I think it was an exboyfriend from high school. We were messing around on the bed with our clothes on. The next minute we're on the floor me on top of him fucking. When we were on the bed I looked out the windows and saw no one in the windows in the other apartment buildings but there were a lot of lights on. Then when we were on the floor I saw a bunch of people watching us. And one guy for some reason I thought he was gay was loading a video camera. And I'm trying to get away from the guy I'm fucking but I can't because he's cumming.

It was all kind of bothersome. Which is odd because for the most part I like being watched while I'm having sex. The times that I have been watched during real sex have really ben a turn on.

So, I don't know I just had to share it all with everyone.

Sorry, I haven't been around much. I've been pretty busy with work. Since, I work retail this is my really busy time of the year.

But something interesting happened at work today. We caught a couple having sex in our fitting rooms. This type of thing used to really annoy me - I have no problem with public sex as long as it isn't in my store.

But this time it was different - it really turned me on. For a few moments while I was waiting for the other manager I listened to them. And it was real quiet but I could hear her really enjoying it. Her moans made me wet.

But we had to kill their fun. We had to knock on the door and let them know only one person was allowed in a room at a time.

And a few minutes later when I saw them being rung up at the cash register - I wanted them to take me into the fitting room. He was so hot. I wanted him inside of me right then.

So tonight, when I got out of work I told Troy about what happened. Told him I wanted to fuck him in a fitting room very soon. We fucked and I imagined he was the guy from the fitting room.