I made it through the weekend. But my body hurts, I think I'm missing more than a few hours of sleep and my feet hurt (I don't think I'll ever be wearing heels or anything similar to that ever again).

I wasn't sure what to write about tonight. There's no new boy or anything like that in my life to update about. Issac called me last night so I have to call him back tonight. It feels like a chore. He doesn't excite me right now. And Ryan called me when I was driving home from work. I don't want him to think I'm interested in a relationship with him but I don't to lose him as a friend. If I did, who else would I have to cuddle with?

My friend left her cell in my car last night, so I had to drop it off at her house. She lives in the same suburb as my ex. It was weird driving on the streets to her house. I haven't been on the roads for at least a year. It actually was a year because I remember seeing the same Christmas tree sales lots and the same businesses that put up Christmas lights. Everything is the same but almost different. There was a new stop light and new lane. I wanted to turn on the street that leads into his development but that seemed to stalker like and with my luck he would be coming out his driveway and see me. Not that it matters because, really I'm over him.

I drove past the parking lot we had sex in when we couldn't wait the five minutes to drive to his condo. For some reason it reminded me of the first time we had sex or were about to have sex. It was after our second or third time hanging out. He had forced me to go out with him instead of going home to sleep one night after work. We planned on going to some new restaurant that neither of us really knew how to get to. We got lost of course. We stopped in the parking lot of some apartment complex. Found a secluded spot to park and we ended up making out like we've done the past nights. This time a little bit further. We had kind of planned on having sex the next time but I think we were expecting to do it at one of our apartments.

Before our making out had stopped at him feeling me up. We had been in the back seat of his car after our last get together, him on top of me making out. He was hard. I could feel him even through his jeans and mine. He was pushing his hard on against me. I wanted him but I think one of the reasons I liked him was because he didn't fuck me then. But the next time our making out went underneath our clothes, it went to him fingering me. When that started I wanted more. I was wearing a skirt, he pushed it up on me. We pushed my panties to the side. He undid his pants and pulled himself out. I climbed on to him and I felt his skin hard against my waist. But we stopped. Neither of us had any condoms with us. It was like I had a taste but I couldn't have it. It was a tease but it made me want him even more.